After my depot

I love having my depot, because after I get my depot, I can usually go home and have a sleep. The injection has sedative side-effects. I slept from 5pm to 8pm when I got home from the library.

I wasn’t reading books in the library today. I was reading Unseen Warfare at the doctor’s surgery while waiting for my depot. When I was at the library, I was staring off into space, dreading having to go back home again, as I often get attacked by temptations when I am alone in my bedroom.

I really wish I could of helped society somehow. But unfortunately, I am a useless person. But I’m thankful the Australian government allows me to exist.

It is a tough struggle, usually because I’m either unhappy or bored out of my brains.

I wish I had the energy to exercise more, so I could lose all this weight I gained from anti-psychotics. I weighed 122.3kg at the depot today. My weight is slowly creeping up. When you are on medications, the only way to lose weight is to starve yourself or skip dinner.

I look forward to getting anxious. Then maybe I can look forward to my weight dropping.


Losing weight on medication

What I mean by the title is, how does one lose weight on anti-psychotics? Well, it depends on the anti-psychotic the doctor prescribes you, and how your schizophrenia affects your desire to eat. Like, a well person on a low dose of olanzapine for sleep disturbance may gain weight while a severely psychotic schizophrenic on the max dose of olanzapine and paliperidone might lose weight due to anxiety experienced from constant auditory hallucinations.

I’ve heard that people respond to anxiety differently. Some people stop eating when severely anxious while others may gorge on food when anxious. So if you are the type that stops eating when anxious, it may be useful to tailor your medication to a dose that makes you well enough to stay out of hospital, but you still feel limited anxiety so that you don’t eat much.

My recommendation for myself is this: either I reduce the anti-depressant by 100mg or I reduce the injection of anti-psychotic by 50mg. I’m currently on 200mg of anti-depressant and 150mg of injectable form of anti-psychotic. My anti psychotic injection is Invega Sustenna, which is neither good nor bad for weight gain, according to my doctor. But the risk is, I may ring up the hospital for a hospital stay, and the psychiatrist will just prescribe me more fat pills.

So it is best to stay out of hospital, because a schizophrenic will just gain weight in hospital. The medication causes fat to be stored around the cheeks, stomach, and breasts, thereby giving schizophrenics the appearance of a medication belly. It’s good the meds act as chemical castratives, thereby reducing their desire to seek a partner, because the meds cause the schizophrenic to become significantly uglier, drastically reducing their chances of finding a partner.

That’s the advice of a schizophrenic for fellow schizophrenics. Hope it helps!

Me at a country town

In this photo, I’m on the left, and my father is in the middle.

This was taken at a country town called Boonah.

I gained a lot of weight being on anti-psychotic medication. Otherwise, I’d be skinnier than my dad.

I am looking a little on the chunky side, because I’ve used extra medication to stabilize my moods. I did feel a little depressed and without purpose recently.

I can exercise a little, and on my YouTube channel ‘Mr Keai’ I am doing qi gong and sparring exercises.