My trip to the psychiatrist

This is probably the 500th time I’ve consulted a psychiatrist. It ain’t anything special, except the psychiatrist sympathises with me and respects me.

I asked about medication reductions. He said it is better to stay on the current dose until I feel very stable in my life. I mean unless I’m enjoying life. Because reducing meds increases the risk of a psychotic breakdown.

He also said that research has shown that the outcome for people on injections of anti-psychotic medication is better than for those who take anti-psychotics in a tablet form.

I said I wanted to know his opinion on ‘being on the lowest dose necessary to maintain mental wellness.’ I think this dose IS the lowest dose. Even though it is the max dose of the anti-psychotic.

I recommend psychiatrists for people who have no where else to go, where alternative treatments haven’t helped and they are at risk of suicide. Life is beautiful, however boring it may be. Who knows, dear reader, you may meet your true love if you stay alive long enough!


The night before my depot

I’ve been on injections since winter 2017. I was on depots before then, but I had breaks in between where I took tablets instead of injections.

It is strongly recommended that I take the depot of 150mg Invega Sustenna every 28 days. But my psychiatrist said that if my illness worsens, then I can take it every 21 days. But I prefer it every 28 days, as my weight begins to lessen towards the 28th day.

I weighed 119.7kg on the scales at the start of today. It has been the first time in a while that my weight was below 120kg. I was 60kg before I started taking medication back in 2006. I was in grade 11 when I had my first hospital stay. Before that stay, I weighed 58kg, afterwards, I weighed 80kg. Fancy how much damage anti-psychotics do to your body.

Today was ok at the shops, where I got a haircut for 10 dollars. Very cheap in my opinion. The way I felt was how I felt on a good day in grade 8 in 2003. I was doing tennis and rowing at Brisbane State High School. It was like a day during the holidays. Fancy that, my entire life is like a big holiday, as I receive the disability support pension!

Hopefully my anxiety won’t worsen once I get the depot tomorrow. I hope I can lose more weight, for my health. Also, having more confidence with the women would help lol.

Nah, no woman from the sushi train or hair salon would date me in a million years. They would ask ‘what do you do?’ I’d honestly say ‘I’m a schizophrenic on a pension.’ So they’d be like ‘how do I get out of here?’ LOL.