the life of lovely
This is my recent mild contribution to the internet.
I try to do some qi gong, hoping it would be inspiration to friends on my social media accounts.
I try to have positive self-esteem. But I get hypersensitive when I am scolded or criticised harshly.
I am still a little hollow on the inside, even though I take many vitamins.
It is about 12am midnight. I have insomnia, even though I’ve taken extra meds.
Goodnight all.
For some reason, I can touch my toes. My legs don’t look 100% straight. And my back is bent wayyyy over.
I might upload a video of me doing push ups, to see how many I can do on extra medication. In the description of this YouTube video, I list what meds I’m on.
Meds slow me down, but they prevent me from going manic and becoming violent. I still haven’t learnt how to truly forgive. Each day, I think about the bad things that have happened to me. Not deliberately, they just pop into my mind out of nowhere.
Such is the life of a schizophrenic.
I think old men sometimes have better flexibility than me. I wish I was more flexible.
I do not know if I already posted a blog with this video. If I did, here it is again for your convenience!
I think I can just barely kick above hip height on a good day.
I checked my weight on the scales. Just a bit under 122kg.
I still have trouble losing the weight. When I get sad and depressed, I often take extra meds, which further increases my appetite, which slows my weight-loss.
I wish I had better muscle tone. But it is ok, I just exercise for health.
I probably already put this video up. Nobody seems to watch it on my YouTube channel. It only has about 22 views to it. Sometimes I do wish it were more popular, but then I’d get a lot of trolling.
On a positive note, I weighed about 119.4kg on the scales today. This was due to me eating Truplenish instead of dinner last evening. I also went out yesterday on the bus to my favourite shopping mall. God bless me.
Maybe there is life after death. The death of the soul, with all its positive attributes, that is.
One of the people online said that my sparring is more like dancing. I know I could make all kinds of criticisms about my fighting style. I am not good at fighting, due to the severity of my disability. I can not compete with other young men.
I haven’t sparred with my friend for at least 6 months. I did more sparring when I felt more confident. Now I’m just a shadow of my former self. I have gained more weight. When I stepped on the scales today, I weighed 122kg. So my weight isn’t going anywhere.
I went to social tennis today. I feel happier playing social tennis than doing sparring with my buddy. I’m not good at tennis, either. I am slow on the court.
That’s my life.
This is a link to my YouTube page, if anybody was interested.
My life is pretty boring as you can see. I weigh 118.2kg according to the scales in the treatment room at my General Practice. I wish I could lose a little more weight.
I try to get on with people in my life, such as my mom and dad. They accept me wholeheartedly, despite my disabilities.
I’m sort of glad that Australian society is not yet communist, although I don’t know what will happen to the world after my passing into the next life.
I wish health and goodness to anybody reading my blog.
Also, here is a video of me doing push ups.
Also, here is a video of me doing more push ups when I weighed slightly less.
I might of sent this before. This is before we set up the cat enclosure.
I probably weigh much too much now. God bless me!
It sure is easier to attract readers on WordPress than to attract people to watch my videos on YouTube. Maybe it is because I don’t add tags to my YouTube videos.
I remember why I took the vaccine, even though I am an anti-vaxxer. I owe the Australian government my loyalty. They have given me at least 200 000 dollars over the last 13 years I’ve been on a disability support pension. Even though I nearly spent it all, I do owe the Australian government my obedience.
I am expendable, if the vaccine will eventually kill me. I do not deserve to live. I have never paid any taxes. I have only worked less than 10 hours in total in all my life. Even if the vaccine does not kill me, my medication for my mental illness will.
God said ‘no one can serve two masters.’ I guess I’m more loyal to the secular humanist state than I am to Christendom. I have endured a lot of social rejection at churches, both Protestant and Orthodox. Therefore I attribute blame to God.
I must be a really ugly person to of only ever had 1 girlfriend in all my life. Maybe I am not even a 2 out of 10, maybe I am just a 1. I am 120kg, and counting. But I can still do gentle exercise without vomiting too much. Sorry, that was a little bit of a bad joke at the end there. I don’t exercise unless I’ve had 2-3 hours without food.
Do I not look radical? I think I look radical. Hopefully this promotion of my sparring will help get a little bit of views on my YouTube channel.
Is it weak sparring or week(ly) sparring. I hardly ever practise shadow boxing by myself when I’m at my home, now that the temperature is rising. It gets warm during October. In Brisbane, we had a hot couple of days in the last month of winter, which makes me worry about global warming. Sure wish the industrialised nations would stop polluting, as I prefer colder weather.
As I’m writing this, it is warm, but not humid, so it is a relief. I probably would only do gentle stretches and Qi Gong in my room with the air-conditioning on, though.
Any comments about my sparring form? From my perspective, I do not cover my face often enough, making it easy for my opponent to strike my face. Also, I was jumping around a lot, to give the impression that I have energy when I actually do not. My kicks are low, but my partners kicks are noticeably higher than my own, which I praise him for it.
Hope my blog is interesting!
I can’t believe I can still do these exercises, after all these years, and at my current dose of medication. I take 150mg Invega Sustenna Depot injection syringe, 200mg Desvenlafaxine, and 3mg paliperidone. It is very difficult to lose weight, unless I get nervous and stressed and stop eating. Then I will likely ask my psychiatrist for an increase in meds, which will bring back my appetite.
The only way to lose weight on medication is to starve yourself. It would be possible, if I were chained to my bed and released only to go to the toilet. That’s how bad the hunger is on medication. Anti-psychotics usually do that to you.
My sincere wish is none of my fellow bloggers may need to take anti-psychotics, as they are the worst form of medication. I don’t know why people are up in arms about the Covid vaccine, the Covid vaccine would have less side effects, long and short term, than long term anti-psychotics. I’ll probably be dead before I’m 60. Good thing I’m going regularly to confession with the priest. I hope to get past the aerial toll houses.
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