After the depot 22/12/22

Christmas is almost here! I got my depot today. My doctor had a lot of advice for me. But I might not put it into practice.

There is nothing to do in this city. You are either working or studying, you are not suffering from a mental illness. Guess no city caters for the mentally ill.

But either way, I feel depressed. I had anti depressants, anti psychotics, and coffee and tea, and I still feel blue. Guess that is how my brain is wired.

I miss the years before 2005. I miss the years before I had to take medication long term. Life was better, even at high school, because at least I’d have an activity that I could do.

Life is quite lonely now. I really wish I wasn’t expelled from high school. I wish I could of left on my own.

But either way, life is depressing. I might go practice contemplation, if I can.

God bless you all.

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