Ok, so I was glancing back at a few of my blog posts and remembered one where I claimed I was perfect.
I believe when you come across most of the posts of mine, you should take it with a grain of salt. I know I can not get through the aerial toll-houses.
So, in my schizophrenia, I have delusions that I am perfect, a Saint, but yet going to hell. Hell is a reality I believe in, because I find it very very hard to forgive others. Jesus said ‘forgive, and you shall be forgiven.’ St Francis of Assisi said ‘for it is in pardoning that we are pardoned.’
My own self has become hell, as I venerate myself, just so I don’t break down and cry when thinking of the amount of dishonour I’ve received as a disabled person.
I think a desert father once said ‘you know a man is overcome by the spirit of vainglory when he cries at the many insults he has received.’ I actually don’t know how to overcome vainglory, or pride.
St John Cassian in his ‘conferences’ tells monks to ‘avoid bishops and women,’ to overcome vainglory. I will ask my priest what that means.
Ok that last factoid about the conferences I’m not 100% sure about.
I’m just a schizophrenic who reads a lot of religious texts.
Dealing with discrimination against things like disability is hard, because that kind of discrimination is based on flawed assumptions about a group of people rather than pointing out things that the individual actually needs to work on.
I agree!