Sick after the depot

This is the first day after my depot. I woke up with a sore throat. I slept a lot during the day. Now I’m awake at night.

Guess this is God’s punishment for me not forgiving others no matter what they do. I still am a secular humanist in deed and word.

I really wish I could repent and truly be merciful, to help me get through the 20th aerial toll-house. It is the toll house of unmercifulness. I must be more merciful to everybody, including people who have been disrespectful to me.

God bless all of you.

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